Summer and the Move

We'll Summer is in full swing. The kids have had one week out of school and it has been such chaos! The first half of june is always hard with school ending and both the older girls birthdays, but adding to the mix is the 'big move'. We are going to be trading houses with my parents sometime in the next month. This whole thing came about at their suggestion - They knew we were cramped with 6 of us in this little 1200 sq ft, 3 bedroom house and they're having to maintain and heat a 5 bedroom 2000 sq ft place, with a pool! This is my childhood home, which is a whole 'nother level of weird, but the fact that they're willing to trade us is just amazing and wonderful. And a huge job. We've lived here for about 14 years and have 4 kids worth of junk to go through and pack. They've lived in that house for 30 years and have rooms full of clutter to go through. We've been working on our stuff steadily, we got a box in our driveway that I am using as a way station to sort through junk and for a holding area for all the junk I'm going to sell. Yes, I said sell. I've broken down and agreed to have a yard sale. Don't get me wrong, I love yard sales, going to them. I hate, hate hate! giving them. It makes me dislike people so much. I've had two in my life and both times I had rude and nasty people, I had people steal stuff, break stuff and fight over stuff. I always try to look at the positive in life and the good in people, but some people just don't behave their best, or even humanely at yard sales. It brings out the worst in some. As I've been working over the last month, I have been taking car loads of clutter to the Salvation army, Good will and the homeless shelter, but when we emptied our attic my husband made me realize that we have a lot, I mean a LOT of junk that we can get rid of and we could sell to make a bit of money to help with the cost of the move. So, I broke down to the pressure (read: he bribed me with spending money at the needlework store LOL) and agreed to hold a yard sale. Now I just have to get everything organized for it. Big job, sure to take me weeks. Do you think I can stall until October when the yard sale season ends around here? : )

guess who's crawling

Ahhhhh the reign of terror has begun. The baby is mobile! Hide your shoes, pick up your little toys and 'chokers' There's no stopping her now! LOL! Life in general has been improving; I'm finally feeling that I can get a handle on the house keeping and while it's never really tidy (Cleaning a house while raising kids is like shoveling the walk while it's still snowing) it's at least clean under the scattering of toys and shoes and stuff that kids seem to shed like feathers. I had an old friend come to town and got to visit with her over a cuppa tea for three afternoons in a row. It was great to catch up with her and it was just like old times, but it was bittersweet because the only reason she was in town was to put her old house on the market. She used to live here and had to move because of her hubby's work, but they held on to their house and rented it out. I guess I always hoped that they'd be back, but now it doesn't look like that will happen. She's living in Santa Monica now, so I'll probably only see her once or twice a year instead of 2-3 days a week. sigh. I'm really looking forward to summer.. the kids have only 3 more weeks of school and we have a crazy month of June ahead of us with out of town visitors, birthdays for both of my older girls, tying up the brownie's for the year and hopefully moving to our bigger house at the end of the month..I'm looking forward to July when I'll be able to breathe a big sigh of relief and take a nap. LOL! Hear hear for naps!

crazy like a squirrel

To start I have a pic for you; In my neighborhood we have a bunch of squirrels that are so dark they are nearly black. They are regular squirrels that normally would be gray, but because people in the neighborhood noticed a black variation a few years ago, the squirrels are well fed and the black variant is becoming more and more common. They're cute. Here's a pic of one lounging in the spring sun on my back fence.
Well life has been hectic and hard lately, and I have felt rather frantic, like a squirrel in the fall. This year appears to be one of introspection and emotional and mental growth for me. I have been doing a lot of self examination and pondering over my relationships with people and the world in general. I think everyone has a bit of self delusion; we lie to ourselves about our motivations and our responsibility for things. We ignore things because to acknowledge them would require hard work or pain on our parts. It's basic human nature and everyone does it, I am certainly no exception. I think the secret to a happy life is to, every once in a while, be honest with yourself. Completely and totally honest. I'm doing it now and it's not easy - I've had to admit several things to myself; I'm far too controlling and proud for my own good. I struggle everyday with an impossible list of things to do, most of which are dictated by my pride and the rest are my attempts at controlling every aspect of my life. At the same time, I'm sabotaging my weight loss attempts on a regular basis. Why? I'm not sure yet, but at least I can see that I am doing it - I used to deny that: it wasn't my fault that I didn't have time for the gym (The class I wanted was at the wrong time, I was too busy, the baby's were napping at the time I was going - you know the 1000 excuses) And I had to eat right? So if I had spent the morning doing errands and ended up going through a drive thru for lunch, well I deserved it. sigh.
Anyway, this current mode of introspection has helped me realize that I need to be a bit more realistic in my expectations of myself and my husband and children. I strive to be the 'perfect mom' you know that Stereo-typical Super Mom. But one of the things I'm coming to realize is that it's just not achievable for me. I cannot juggle the housekeeping, the raising of 4 kids (including a teenage daughter and all that attitude that comes with it, an 8 year old demanding angel, a toddler boy who is potty training (!)and a 6 month old baby girl)helping them with homework and social stuff, after school activities and sports, be a brownie leader and volunteer at the school, manage all our finances, get ready to move, take care of the pets, work out daily and diet, make sure my family eats healthy yummy meals, be a good and supportive wife to my hubby, and all the other stuff that I feel responsible for, as well as find time for myself to sit and stitch. I cannot do it all and stay sane. The pressure of doing it all perfectly is what is crushing me. I don't just let my kids grow up- I try really hard to parent 'perfectly' which is a fairly variable thing given the wide range of my kids ages, but I think essentially boils down to helping them grow and develop into normal, healthy, happy adults. The struggle is that I'm never sure how it's going; I don't get graded, or progress reports on my work, I have to do it by instinct and guesses. I suppose what I've realized is that I need to focus on the things that are really important, not just the stuff that my pride dictates. I can't be running in every direction at once; I've got to be focused on just the important things like a squirrel in the fall; get the nuts, and save them, just the nuts. Obviously the kids, the hubby and stitching win out. The housework and all the rest will have to wait.

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!
Busy, Busy, Busy! Life is buzzing like a beehive! Our calendar is so packed right now I'm relieved whenever something gets dropped off. I was so grateful when soccer practice got rained out yesterday - It's always hard on days when my Brownie Troop meets, but yesterday was particularly exhausting. I was so worn out that I sent the hubby off with the kids to dinner and stayed home with the two little ones (the boy was asleep - he's fighting naps right now so he crashes at about 5 pm each day) and had OATMEAL for dinner. Yes, passed up a dinner out, fixed by someone else and had a boring old, microwaved bowl of oatmeal! LOL! but let me tell you, that 1 hour off quiet and calm was wonderful! Here's hoping you find a bit of peace in your easter weekend!

a quote to inspire and book review

There were all those unkindnesses, palpable, daily, so easily avoidable; but one could not think just of those.. or one would spend one's time in tears - and the unkindnesses would continue. So the small things came into their own: small act of helping others, if one could; small ways of making one's own life better; acts of love, acts of tea, acts of laughter.
- from The Good Husband of Zebra Drive by Alexander McCall Smith


I love this series! I just finished the 8th book "The Good Husband of Zebra Drive". Set in Botswana it is a mystery series with colorful characters and casts an honest but kindly eye on humanity. The atmosphere is warm and loving without drifting into sappy sweetness. The first book in the series is called "The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency" and there are I believe 9 in the series at this time. If you're in the mood for a good story intertwined with a bit of mystery and humor, pick one of these up, pour your self a cuppa tea and enjoy!

Butterflies Butterflies

Every spring we are the lucky observers of butterfly migrations. For a few weeks, every where you look you can see butterflies flitting. The trees in our neighborhood act as sort of a funnel so a large portion of them go right through our backyard! Once the sun is up, you can see about 5 - 10 butterflies each minute. The kids and I were out enjoying the wonderful sunny spring day and they agreed to catch me a few butterflies so I could take a picture for this blog. I think we caught 5 in about 15 minutes! of course we let them go right away, but I managed to snap a few pics. The baby even got in on it. I'm sure she thought her siblings had gone nuts jumping up and down and waving their arms around but she enjoyed the show!

Book Review - Runaway Mistress

So as you can tell by my sideline I'm a bibliophile or book lover. I read constantly, or as much as I can with 4 kids! I have a serious addiction to books! As you can imagine this could be expensive, however I manage to keep the costs down two ways; the old fashioned library and a FANTASTIC site called pbs.com or Paper Back Swap. This site has saved me hundreds (really!) over the year + I've been a member. I LOVE it! check it out! Anyway, once in a while on this blog I will do some book reviews on books that stand out. I have a handful of favorite authors and I'll talk about them some, but I just finished a cute little romance that I sincerely enjoyed; Robyn Carr's Runaway Mistress. I've never read anything by her before and this was an older one (written in 2005)but it was clever, with an endearing heroine and a nice climax that made you wonder if the white knight was going to swoop in in and rescue her in time. I also enjoyed the main characters self discovery and appreciation of the simple things in life. A nice, cheerful novel that I would rate as: Definitely worth your time. Happy reading!